Saturday, February 16, 2008

i had a really, REALLY good dream last night.
it was truly SUCH a bummer to have to wake up this morning...

in my dream, i met this guy (only in the dream he looked like a mix of himself and Jared Leto):

during a layover in LA
and we struck up a friendship.
hung out for several days,
made his ex-girlfriend jealous,
AND, in the dream, he was a Christian.

it was the craziest thing,
but the dream felt so REAL.
like, nothing was terribly outlandish or absurd, as dreams usually go.

here are my predictions as to WHY i had this dream last night:

* 2 nights ago i was watching some of the latest episodes of this guy's show
(Friday Night Lights) and checking out his bio and stats online
(cause im a silly girl like that)

* last night, i visited briefly with my grandpa, and one of the first things out of his mouth was:
"so are you married yet?"
typical. we seem to always come around to that subject during our visits these days....

*during dinner with mumsy, we talked a lot about Heath and Hollywood, and the great need
for more Christians in the entertainment industry

* somewhere between visiting grandpa and going to bed, i watched the latest episode of
My So-Called Life on, and, well, lets just say NOTHING about that episode
was conducive to aiding in my commitment to NOT dwell on guys and kissing and
such things of the romantical sort.

.:: cue dream ::.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

his weekend has drained me.

at an meeting on saturday afternoon, my church--my little movie theater church that i've grown to love so dearly--received the news that our pastor, Ben, is stepping down from the position, after 6 years of laboring with this church plant.
they're burned out, he and his wife, and since his primary gifting is to plant and not necessarily shepherd and pastor, he feels hes now doing more harm than good, and is not able to help the body grow into all it could be.

you know, it really breaks my heart, not so much that he's no longer going to be our pastor (though that is distressing enough), but that he and his wife and their 2 precious little boys will be leaving.
gone. absent. no longer a part of RCC.
theyre our FRIENDS
its like....losing a part of us.
we have relationships with these people--they KNOW us, love us and care for us. theyre intertwined in our lives, and now, suddenly...theyre gone.

lots of tears were shed yesterday.
none of us saw it coming, really.... but Ben and Ainsley have prayed about it, turned it over and over again in their heads, and they feel its time...and as their brothers and sisters in Christ, we're supporting them.

but saying goodbye is SO so very hard...

today reminded me much of the Friends finale.
Phoebe, Ross, Rachel and Joey have helped Chandler and Monica move the last boxes, theyve all turned in their keys...
then they hug goodbye, and ask,
"so, do you have to leave right away or do you have some time? maybe we could get one last cup of coffee...?"
that was today. the lingering, the long hugs goodbye....."do you have to leave right away? maybe we could have one last brunch...?"
the friendships dont end, but we all know things will never be the same again.

but we're committed to this church and this ministry.
the church isnt about Ben--its about JESUS.
THATS who we're here for.

and so we press on.

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all
circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."
1 Thess. 5:16-18

bind us together, Lord...