Thursday, June 17, 2010

allright. im just gonna say it.
i like you. quite a lot, and for some time now.
and it KILLS me that you might move away.
that you would even CONSIDER it makes my insides churn
because that means, quite obviously, that theres nothing here that might entice you to stay--that I am not enough to entice you to stay.
so. that shoots my hopes down, once and for all.

its a tricky thing, hope.
having even the tiniest strand of it can keep you afloat on the abysmal sea of disappointment.
and even though we sometimes doubt our hope is valid and true, its very existence is enough to keep us buoyant.
we'd rather hope--however faintly, even to the point of lying to ourselves--than be faced with the truth indisputable.

and this is the truth indisputable: my admiration is one-sided. you do not return my affection. therefore, its time to abandon this hope, once and for all.

goodbye hope.


ministrywifefamilylife said...

So Sarah, who is this mystery man? And have you told him your thoughts? How can we convince someone not to leave if he doesn't know what's beckoning him to stay?

Sarah Faith said...

uhhh id like him to want to stay without me having to convince him!! i shouldnt have to CONVINCE him that im worth stickin' around for, ya know..? ideally, i'd like him to want me on his OWN initiative. so... :)