Thursday, October 27, 2005

oh stab and twist.

how lovely. she gets an "youre amazing, i adore you" comment and im left with no comment and still no email. its been over a week.
is avoidance just some preservation/survival thing?
or am i missing something here?
man, distance and time are great in many ways, but they definitely dont help in the speculation/analyzing department. ive got barely anything to work with so what i DO have makes my mind jump to crazy conclusions.
one of my worse fears is that theyre not so crazy....

im sick of this relationship crap. even friendships are too much of an effort. why do we want them so badly? singleness is truly such a great option.
its solid. its reliable.

right now im torn between crying and embracing the "freedom" this presents.
not that it wasnt presented before...cause it was. too often, in fact.
but its getting easier to let go.
i guess thats good....

but im scared.
maybe its fear that motivates all of this....

"there is no worse death than the loss of hope"

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